Who are you?
I had a coach named Jon Roberts that would ask me this question at the beginning of each session.
And for months, I didn’t quite know how to answer it.
It is one of those questions that left me thinking “How the hell do I answer this?”
And yet, every session, he’d ask me this damn question.
I’d get so squeamish.
Who the fuck am I, I’d say to myself.
And then I’d put together some half-hearted response and blurt it out, followed by an awkward laugh.
“I’m David, I’m a person who loves and believes in people.” I’d say without much belief in myself. And then I’d laugh.
As if being David wasn’t enough or something. I didn’t know how to hold the weight of who I was.
And then one time my coach asked me why I laughed awkwardly after answering.
After thinking about it, I said “Because I’m worried about what you are going to think and so I’m trying to laugh it all off somehow.”
And then he had this simple yet brilliant insight.
He said, “Notice this - when answering a question about who you are - you are more worried about what people are going to think about your answer than you are about what YOU think of your answer.”
Shit. Well that’s a fun revelation.
So we began to do coaching work on this.
And I slowed it all down. And I got quiet and composed.
And from then on, when he’d ask me “Who are you” - I’d pause and take a breath.
And we worked on what way of responding was authentic for me, regardless of what others would think.
And we came up with this simple phrase.
“I am a human.”
And that simple starting point was so helpful for me.
Before this, I would always try to come up with some slick marketing glitz and glamour super catchy awesome slogan thing. And that never worked for me.
And then I began to build on, from the heart.
“I am a human. You are a human. We all are humans. And I love humans.”
And from that base - I felt much more grounded in saying anything that came after that.
And the biggest thing was this - I believe in it. And I didn’t care what others thought of my answer.
And that was the most insightful part of this journey.
To let go of what others thought, so I had a quiet space to listen to what I thought.
Who are you?
I am a human. You are a human. We are all humans.